The impact of age on Dickness.

I think one of the hallmarks of getting older is that you become less of a dick. I think that's because, the odd trust fund baby aside, most people you grew up with are probably now working and raising families and are basically just trying their best to get by, pay their bills, and have a decent life. When you're young, everyone seems to be defined by other things...how they look, what kind of music they listen to, whether they like sports or theater or drugs, whether they have skulls or little alligators on their shirts, what have you. But, by now, virtually all those people are basically doing the same thing: striving for a minimally stable and comfortable life with their family. And yes, they probably still have all of those same differences in culture, values, and appearance, but, really, those differences are minor compared to the vast similarities. Everyone has to make rent, buy diapers, and have a boss.

I think I have become less of a dick over the years. I'm less judgy than I once was...less apt to dismiss someone outright based on some minor detail about their life. And I'm less apt to freak out about the fact that I'm different than a lot of people (in my political beliefs and general lifestyle).

But, still, I can't help but noticing differences...ways that I am somewhat out of the ordinary. Here's one that happens to be on my mind this morning for no particular reason.

As far as alcohol is concerned, I could take it or leave it.

I mean, I don't HATE it or anything. It just doesn't get me excited. I like a good glass of bourbon here and there, but in general, I'd just rather drink chocolate milk or soda. Cause chocolate milk is fucking delicious, and many beers and liquors taste like a hobo's ass crack. And chocolate milk does not make me feel like satan's maxi pad for 24 hours after I finish it.

Which brings me to being drunk; it's just not that great. I've had plenty of good times getting drunk with people, but I've also had plenty of good times being sober, and the feeling of drunkenness just isn't usually worth the pain of the hangover for me. Most of the time, it just makes me tired. Plus I pretty much despise going to bars. I don't know...I usually can't sit down, the booze is expensive, I can't hear anybody talk, and the bathrooms are gross. Yeah...bars can pretty much suck out the turdlets from my asshair and choke on them.

I'm not begrudging you, dear reader, your enjoyment of alcohol or bars. I'm just non-judgmentally pointing out a difference between you and I in this particular area of life and am noting its psycho-sociological curiosity.