Fish stories

It's official. My job is boring. Nothing even remotely exciting, death defying, or heroic is going to happen to me, or be done by me, at work.

So, I've taken to little bursts of stream-of-consciousness lies about my day.

Like today, what I really did was have a few people sign some forms. then I played banjo for an hour or so. then I left. that part's all true.

But, if somebody asked me what I did today, I might say. oh, not much...I ate a demon cat and fought a giant ninja with moon shaped throwing starts. I built a fort in a treehouse and caught a snake with my barehands. I climbed a mountain with a falcon and saw winnie the pooh cooking meth. I lashed together a raft made from cornflakes and gum to whitewater down the razor river of pirrahnas. I lifted a car off a dying superbaby and took the burden of his powers from him for 20 years. magic carpet genie flying bomb nazi tank helmet race escape!

It was an ok day.